14 #YesAllWomen Tweets, Rape and Sex

I just came across this article on Stumble Upon and I thought I would share it because it deserves to get more reads.

http://http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/1kmdWR/1S8hqo.Yf:qQwka-SV/thoughtcatalog.com/rob-fee/2014/05/14-yesallwomen-tweets-that-everyone-needs-to-see

Not all men set out to intimidate women but there are a lot of men, who don’t think twice about giving women unwanted attention.

It is a risk for women and young girls to be walking around at night or in secluded locations alone, which is why you should always let people know where you are going. If you arrive in a group, stay in your group and check everyone is together before going home.

I remember being about 14 or 15 walking to a friend’s house and a man pulling up alongside me in his car and asking me if I wanted a lift because he was ‘going my way’.

I also remember having to run home from the shops when I was with my baby brother in his pushchair one day as I became aware of a man following us. I was shaking with freight by the time I got home.

 

The internet in particular has given us so many more opportunities to access potential partners. I see a lot of men talking on the internet about women in terms of sexual conquests. With memes being passed around entitled ‘sliding into her DMs like’.

Yes its a bit of fun and a joke among your mates, women talk about men in a similar way but sometimes its nice to be seen and respected for your personality and not your physical attraction.

You might not be as sexy as that porn star they’ve been watching or the latest model taking her top off on the front cover of a magazine but you are more attainable and a person of value in your own right.

We don’t all want to be treated like a piece of meat at every available opportunity or to be graded as ‘fuckable but not dateable’, we do have feelings.

Every girl deserves to be treated well and not just ‘fucked’. If that’s all they want too then fine but how many times do girls get led on with the promise of more only to get dropped?

Men will always be ‘lads’ if they have multiple sexual partners it will always be accepted and in some ways encouraged.

If a women has had multiple sexual partners then she is a ‘slut’ or a ‘whore’ and men tend to treat her as such and she can be seen as fair game.

If you are nice to a girl you will increase the chances of her being nice back. Who knows you might find you like her rather than feeling the need to force her or make her feel uncomfortable.

If she isn’t interested then she isn’t interested. Just like if you don’t like a girl nothing they do will make you like them.

As for the part in the article where they talk about when it is ok to rape someone the only answer to that question is NEVER.

The fact it is even a question that needs to be asked is worrying because it means that parenting and education are failing to teach people the basics of human interaction.

As the article points out a man was uneasy at the unwanted attention he received from another man’s sexual advances but hadn’t thought how his own unwanted advances could have made a woman feel.

My response to any boy/ man I’ve ever encountered who thought rape was funny is always if someone did it to you would you still be laughing? Strangely enough they never find that funny.

It isn’t only women that get raped, men do too but are often too ashamed to admit to it because of the stigma around it.

Rape should be seen by society as an awful thing that has no place in the modern world. people who rape should be brought to account for their actions, just as anyone else committing a crime would be.

Victims of rape should be seen as just that whether they are men or women and treated appropriately and not told they were probably ‘asking for it’. No-one should be made to feel ashamed for being raped.

We need to educate young people on all the ways that sex can now be accessed so they can make sound decisions. We need to teach them that sharing pictures and videos of themselves on the internet comes with a risk even if you know the person you are sending them to.

We need to educate young people that the sex you see on the internet is not always what sex is like in real life. Not everyone has those boundaries and someone is not wrong or weird for not wanting to do some of the exploits that you see online.

We need to teach young people that in order to have fulfilling relationships and sexual relationships you need to trust your partner. No means no and you should never force someone to do anything they don’t want to do.

We need to teach young people that if you meet a woman in a club and she wants to dance with you that doesn’t mean she wants to have sex with you or you to grope her. Respect people’s personal boundaries.

We need to teach young people that there is no rush to become sexually active. Just because you have a boyfriend/ girlfriend doesn’t mean you have to be having sex.

Just because you call a girl your girlfriend doesn’t mean she has to have sex or suck your dick and it doesn’t matter if all the other girls are doing it, she doesn’t have to if she doesn’t want to.

Neither does it mean that because she doesn’t want to do it with you there is something wrong with her. She might not be ready or might not be in the mood and that is ok.

Sexual health is an important subject but due to many young people having a joking view of sex they aren’t taking the necessary precautions. As such there is a rise in sexually transmitted diseases.

It is important for everyone who is sexually active and especially with multiple partners to get themselves checked regularly for sexually transmitted diseases and above all to use protection.

If you have a sexually transmitted disease you have a responsibility to let a potential sexual partner know about it so they are aware of the risk. Don’t ever knowingly or willingly infect someone with a disease.

We could all use a healthier outlook on sex and relationships from time to time.

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